The Who, What, When, Where, and Why of 40's

30 Racks....FUCK YOU!

Olde English....LOVE YOU!

Zach: I don't know about you, but I'm poor as shit. I'm in college, so what's a man to do with a hankering for some quality potables?

Mikey: Let me go ahead and answer that question for you, Zach. Have you ever considered purchasing a forty ounce container of a malty, liquory, heavenly beverage?

Classic Mikey right? Everyone knows that malt liquor is the bottom of the barrel of liquors. But wait...have my tastes changed? This beverage is not the one I remember. It's light, refreshing, titillating, and in a comically large bottle. What the fuck is not to like? Right? Right?? Right.

This whole quagmire came to my attention the other day in an acute form. One of my incredibly brilliant brothers (D. Michael Ruiz) told me something which may change my life as I know it. Now if you're stubborn in your ways and want to continue drinking shitty beer at outrageously high prices in regular sized cans, turn away from the screen now. However, if you want to reach alcohol nirvana, please continue with the blog post. Anyway, it went a little like this: "EIGHTEEN DOLLAR TWELVE PACKS OF OLDE E. AT BEERS OF THE WORLD". Praise Jesus/Allah/Yahweh what have you.

I was thinking, what's better than the number 12? The number 40. Refer to Figure 2 above. You know who would drink out of that little dildo can? Joseph Goebbels. Real men drink out of 40s. That's right I said it in front of everyone. Nazis suck. Especially that Goebbels character. What a putz.

Anyhoot, I've realized that the majority of our articles on the blog (2) are about alcohol. Some may call us drunkards. I call us fine upstanding citizens. If don't agree, you can go fuck yourselves. With the wide end of your stupid little 12 ounce bottles. Assholes.

Kinson and Fabian OUT

PS, We're not a freakin' alcohol blog. Get over it. Next week we will probably be updating about alcohol though.